Hi I am Reem and I was assigned your essay to peer critique, so: The intro is not bad, but like around the 5th line I was a little lost with all the wordiness which is what I have difficulties with. Some professors do not like wordy essays especially in the intro, because you need to attract the reader. Start the paragraph with a catch, something interesting so the reader will get tuned and not bored. You emerge quotes really good into your sentences, but I do not see any page numbers. Using MLA style you should in parentheses write the authors last a name and page number. In regards to your work cited page, the sources should not be numbered and they should be organized alphabetically from ascending from a-z. So first on your list will be Vasquez , Welland, and then Zinn. You also have to indent the second line of the source using the “hanging” paragraph form. To find that on Microsoft word right click on the document and go to “paragraph” and then “page layout” then under the indention section it says special and click on “hanging”. GOOD LUCK!!!
https://docs.google.com/document/d/10gRSilyyFmLZpuzGDa1XPhDVrQeKm3-oGY9eyuuJ5I0/edit?hl=en&authkey=CIn44LEK
ReplyDeleteHi I am Reem and I was assigned your essay to peer critique, so:
ReplyDeleteThe intro is not bad, but like around the 5th line I was a little lost with all the wordiness which is what I have difficulties with. Some professors do not like wordy essays especially in the intro, because you need to attract the reader. Start the paragraph with a catch, something interesting so the reader will get tuned and not bored. You emerge quotes really good into your sentences, but I do not see any page numbers. Using MLA style you should in parentheses write the authors last a name and page number. In regards to your work cited page, the sources should not be numbered and they should be organized alphabetically from ascending from a-z. So first on your list will be Vasquez , Welland, and then Zinn. You also have to indent the second line of the source using the “hanging” paragraph form. To find that on Microsoft word right click on the document and go to “paragraph” and then “page layout” then under the indention section it says special and click on “hanging”. GOOD LUCK!!!
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ReplyDeleteA link to your essay with some suggestions:
ReplyDeletehttps://docs.google.com/document/d/14BBj4T7_qvKeyFzSeC1xAaMtqBqzTN2uoILxVn0CmNo/edit?hl=en#
What I meant to say was in the works cited you should arrange the authors last names from a-z
ReplyDelete